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Dog  Shows

 

Dog Showing can be a very enjoyable sport. It can mean pleasant trips with good company, meeting new people and dogs, interesting conversations, lots of laughter, nice picnics, the occasional tipple, and when the rosette comes home with you it is the icing on the cake, but should not equate to the 'be all and end all'. That "win at all cost" attitude, which I think is sad, can spoil a good day out.  If your dog does not win, what does it matter, your opinion cancels out the judges opinion.  Enjoy your dogs and other people will enjoy them too, and always remember 'you bring the best dog home'.

To find out who is judging your breed To Enter Shows Online To See The Results To Print the CACIB certificate gained by your dog

Lament of a Lady "Gone to the Dogs"
There was a time, there really was,
When I was young and tender,
When "show dog" meant a Disney star
And "bitch" was not a gender.

I went to bed at half-past ten,
I went to church on Sunday,
On Saturday, I baked the beans
And did the wash on Monday.

But then, I got a certain pup,
An erstwhile friend said "Show!"
And, so I did, and so I do.
Oh, what I didn't know!

Once I dressed with flair and style;
That was the life - don't knock it!
Now every dress from bed to ball
Must have a good bait pocket.

I used to have a certain air,
I wallowed in perfume.
I used to smell like Nuit d'Amour,
Now I smell like Mr. Groom!

My furniture was haute decor,
My pets, a tank of guppies.
Now I've furniture that is unstuffed
And well-adjusted puppies.

I used to long for furs and jewels,
And a figure classed as "super."
But now the thing I long for most
Is a nice new pooper-scooper!

I was taught to be well-groomed
No matter where I went.
Now all the grooming that I do
Is in the handler's tent.

While once I spoke in pristine prose,
In dulcet tones and frail,
I now am using language
That would turn a sailor pale.

I adored a man who murmured verse
Through intimate little dinners.
But now the words I thrill to hear
Are just three - "Best-of-Winners!"

I really love my doggy life;
I wouldn't care to change it.
But when I get that Best-in-Show,
I could maybe rearrange it.

And when my days on earth are done
I'll go without much nudging;
Just give me three weeks' closing time,
And let me know who's judging.

 Anonymous

 

 

 

 

 Still Learning
"How long have you been with dogs ? " I asked this old chap at the show
"Forty-odd years and more" he replied
"Then there's not much that you wouldn't know"

"I'm still learning" he said, "I'm still learning"
And it made me ponder a while
on those who know it all in three months
and I gave him a ghost of a smile

You could tell he's have none of the new-fangled
He was old-fashioned right down to the core
But I'll bet when judges gathered together
His name would rank up n the fore

He would have hunted and shot over dogs
Before most of us had been born
He'd sat with his dogs in the woods
And with them had scented the dawn

He's bred, shown, paraded and judged
He knew it all outside from in
"But I'm still learning" he said, "I'm still learning"
With his quiet, unobtrusive small grin

So all we ringside Johnny-come-latelys
All we experts who own just one pup
Remember that old guy's forty years of "still learning"
And for goodness's sake learn to shut up!
Why Own A Dog?
Why own a show dog? There's a danger you know.
You can't own just one, for the craving will grow.

There's no doubt they're addictive, wherein lies the danger
While living with lots, you'll grow poorer and stranger.

One dog is no trouble, and two are so funny,
the third one is easy, the forth one's a honey.

The fifth is delightful, the sixth one's a breeze.
You find you can live with a houseful, with ease.

So how 'bout another? Would you really dare?
They're really quite easy, but Lord, the hair!

With dogs on the sofa, and dogs on the bed,
And crates in the kitchen, it's no bother, you said.

They're really no trouble, their manners are great.
What's just one more dog and one more little crate?

The sofa is hairy, the windows are crusty.
The floor is all footprints, the furniture's dusty.

The housekeeping suffers, but what do you care?
Who minds a few nose prints and a little more hair?

So let's keep a puppy, you can always find room.
And a little more time for the dust cloth and broom.

There's hardly a limit to the dogs you can add.
The thought of a cutback, sure makes you feel sad.
Each one is so special, so useful, so funny.
The food bill grows larger, you owe the vet money.

Your folks never visit, few friends come to stay,
except other dog folks who live the same way.

Your lawn has now died and your shrubs are dead too,
Your weekends are busy, you're off with your crew.

There's dog food and vitamins, training and shots
and entries and travel, and motels cost lots.

Is it worth it, you wonder? Are you caught in a trap?
Then that favourite comes up and climbs in your lap.

Her look says you're special and you know you will
keep all the critters in spite of the bill.

Some just for showing, and some just to breed,
and some just for loving, they all fill a need.

winter is a hassle, but the dogs love it true,
And they must have their walks tho' you are numb and blue.

Late evening is awful, you scream and you shout
at the dogs on the sofa, who refuse to go out.

The dogs and the dog shows, the travel, the thrills
the work and the worry, the pleasure, the bills.

The whole thing seems worth it, the dogs are your life.
They're charming and funny and offset the strife.

Your lifestyle has changed, things just won't be the same.
Yes, those dogs are addictive and so's the dog game.
 Authors unknown

FIRST TIME AT A DOG SHOW

First time at a dog show, I'll tell you quite plain,
 I'll never, no never go back there again.
The breeder said "show him." when I bought my dog.
I showed him all right, the whole place was agog!

 They gave me a number, they gave me a pin,
But I couldn't bear to stick the thing in.
So I rushed to the shop and brought some glue,
And I stuck the card onto the rear in the loo.

 We arrived at the ringside to find we were first,
In the dog pup class (this part was the worst)
We marched in together as fast as was able,
Arrived at the judge, who said, "Up on the table!"

 This really surprised me, my skirt was quite tight,
And I just couldn't make it, try hard as I might.
The judge looked quite worried. He said "Listen here,
Put the DOG on the table, not you my dear."

 By Now I was trembling, I felt such a fool,
But I said to myself, "We'll just play it cool."
"How old?", said the judge. I heard it quite clear,
Well, really, thought I, and said, "Thirty next year."

 The Steward, poor fellow, threw a kind of fit,
He sputtered and coughed, his eyes ran a bit.
"I'd have that cough seen to, " I said to him when
He'd finally stopped... but soon started again.

 "Once round the ring, Dear, as fast as you can,"
Said the judge, so I just ran and ran
But, when I arrived (out of breath I'll admit)
The judge said, " your dog, dear." I felt such a twit.

 Off round again, I kept my head bent.
Oh the shame, my pup crouched and just went and went.
A lady came running with a bucket and spade.
With manure that spicy, has she got it made!

 We came back to the judge, who said with a frown,
"Stand your dog." I replied, "He's not lying down!"
You can take First Place Stand, he said. I said, "Ha!"

 What a job I had getting that sand in the car!


(unknown)

Dear Protector of Dogs and Fools,

When that intelligent, hardworking, honest judge finally sees what I see in this dog I've worked so hard and long with, help me to accept my win with grace and dignity.

And, when that blind, clueless idiot - I mean, judge - somehow fails to see what a fine job we've done (well, at least better than the so-and-so he placed ahead of us!), help me to accept my defeat with some of that same grace and dignity.

Lord, you alone know how I've sweated blood over this dog, the hours I've spent getting him ready (and, Lord, are any of them ever ready?). You (and probably only you!) understand why I spend good money on this animal - money I could have spent on lots of other things; things that just might have afforded me a little more pleasure and a lot less frustration.

Lord, tolerate my disappointment when I lose, and help me keep it all in perspective. Help me remember that when some dog show judge gives me the gate, it's not as if St. Peter just gave me those pearly ones.

Lord, clear my eyes and help me see before I open my big mouth, that the so-and-so with the cow-hocked, pony-gaited dink walking out of the ring ahead of me is actually a fellow exhibitor who has also worked hard, maybe even sweated blood over her dog too, and probably deserves to enjoy this moment to its fullest, as it shall not happen again!

Lord, you know there are some times - but not nearly as often as I tend to suppose - when such ugly things as Politics, Prejudice and Unethical Practices may cause my dog to get beaten unfairly sometimes. Help me, then, to remember that several wrongs won't ever make a right, and that none of those wrongs gives me an excuse to act like an idiot.

You know I'm a competitor, Lord; I make no bones about that. I love to win and I hate to get beat. There are few things more abhorrent to me, Lord, than placing sixth out of six. If I didn't love to compete, I'd stay home and knit afghans. But then, there are probably afghan shows, and people who hire professional knitters with high-tech knitting machines, and most likely there are afghan show judges who raise sheep whose wool goes into some of the winningest afghans, and there I'd be - still frustrated, still getting beat, and without a dog to share half the blame.

This year, Lord, help me to have a little more faith in my fellow dog folks, and for Heaven's sake, help me win, or lose,
with a little class!

AMEN                                       (unknown)

 
 An Exhibitor's Lament

The entry was sent off on-line with the pressing of a key
I have a month to sort him out, now it's up to me
Meals consist of measured amounts, no biscuits on the quiet
His eyes show in no uncertain terms what he thinks about the diet
Now roadwork is important, we both need to be fit
Combine it with a gallop for him and I'll just have a sit
And think about the show ahead, and mentally make a list
Of things to do, must trim his nails, nothing must be missed
His coat it shines, his teeth are white, his tail is looking neat
As I look at him I'm happy now, he surely can't be beat
I'm ready now, it's all in place, oh why is life so cruel
I've just looked in my purse and found I can't afford the fuel

(unknown)

 

© Siddhartha Tibetan Terriers Ireland